You’ve already checked your calendar. CNY is in 11 days.
You’re lying in bed doing the math: If I skip lunch three times a week, train every other day, maybe do that ClassPass trial… I could probably drop 5 pounds before the first reunion dinner.
And somewhere in the back of your mind, there’s this quiet hum of: I should probably get serious about this.
Not because you want to. Because February is here. And February means facing everyone.
The Thing We Don’t Say Out Loud
I don’t think you feel broken about your body. I think you’ve just… learned to prepare for it. The annual inspection. The sideways glances. The “Wah, you look different” from Auntie Helen that could mean literally anything but somehow always feels like judgment.
So you do what you’ve always done: you plan. You cut back. You add extra workouts to your week. You Google “how to lose weight fast Hong Kong” at midnight even though you know it won’t help.
It’s not dramatic. It’s just… automatic. Like buying gift boxes at SOGO or clearing your inbox before the office closes. CNY prep now includes “fix how I look so people don’t comment.”
When Training Became Armor
Here’s what I’ve noticed in my own life: I used to love January. Fresh start energy, new intentions, the gym feels good again.
But as it gets closer to Chinese New year, it shifts. The training stops being for me and starts being for them. For the reunion dinner. For the relatives I see once a year who will absolutely have opinions.
There’s a term for what happens in our brains when we’re constantly judged by appearance in social settings: Reflected Self-Appraisal. We start seeing ourselves through other people’s eyes instead of our own. Your body goes into stress mode. Cortisol spikes. Willpower tanks.
That’s why “I’ll just train harder in January” never actually sticks. You can white-knuckle through CNY, but by March you’re exhausted. And next January, you’re back here again.
What If the Entire Framework Is Off?
Training harder won’t make the comments stop. It will just make you more tired when they come. Because even if you lose the weight, even if you show up looking exactly how you think you “should”, someone will still have something to say. So what if we tried something different?
Before CNY: Decide What “Enough” Means
Right now, you have bandwidth. In two weeks, you won’t. Sit down this week and ask: What does a win look like during CNY? Not the Instagram version. The real version. Is it one quick strength session between family dinners? A 20-minute walk when relatives get overwhelming? Not spiraling into guilt every time you eat a pineapple tart?
Write it down. Make it so easy you’d feel silly not doing it.
During CNY: The Bathroom Trick
When someone makes a comment and you feel that spike of panic—disappear to the bathroom. The only socially acceptable escape at family gatherings.
Once you’re there: Breathe in Cyclic Sighing. Take a long inhale, followed by a shorter “sip” of air to fully expand the lungs (a 2-part inhale), then a very long, slow exhale. A 2023 study from Stanford University found this method superior to other techniques for reducing anxiety and improving mood in just 5 minutes.
It won’t stop Auntie Helen from being Auntie Helen. But it will stop her comment from hijacking your entire week.
After CNY: Don’t “Reset”
Your first workout back isn’t a reset. It’s a check-in. How does your body feel? What does it need?
Focus on sleep. Hydration. Movement that doesn’t feel like punishment.
We ease back into the life we’re actually building, with or without a personal trainer.
The Unsexy Truth
What if, this year, instead of training to shield yourself from criticism, you trained to have energy for the people you actually want to see?
That version of fitness is quieter. Less dramatic. Way less marketable on Instagram.
But it’s the one that actually lasts.
Sincerely,
A coach at Limitless who gets it